Choiceless observation: A night walk | Meditative Diaries

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Choiceless observation: A night walk

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Is it possible that someone feels without choice? To feel thoughts and emotions without control, without interfering, without approval or disapproval? To observe without choosing to focus on the unexpected or the beautiful, without trying to avoid the ugly? To listen at the sounds, the words, without judgement,without agreement or disagreement, without putting effort in understanding?

The steps of the observer brough him in the Castles of Salonica. To his surprise he found a great sit in a bench in the edge, so he conveniently sat there (though a pain in the instep of the right food was evident). There is awe because a puzzle of colors, moving colors, spreads in front of him. up to the horizon. A familiar spot of this well known view from the past is a huge street in the left of his visual field first catches his attention. Observing in the periphery of his visual field he perceives the movement of 2 pairs of lights which go uphill the cemetary road. Then sounds and talkings from the dozens of groups of friends which are lying around in order to enjoy the beautiful hot night.  First he observes the chat of three women around 50 in a nearby bench. And he listens at them without trying to understand what they say. Then the bass voice of a man a few meters behind intrudes in his acoustic field and then a discussion between two lovers in the right enters the puzzle. And then something really strange happens.. the several talkings seem to be clarified, the puzzling mix of sounds seems to be sorted out in clear talkings.  and the ability to listen holistically whatever happens that moment is fired. Wow, where were all these clears sounds just a moment ago? Were they all there but the observer wasn’t able to listen at them? Looks like a movie, the moment one takes a drug which opens the doors of perception/feelings and one is able to listen/see everything.  Probably in both cases the cause lies in the ceasing of thought.. in the case of drugs its because of the influence of chemical ingredients while in the second this happens naturally, effortlessly.

A few intentions to focus on the discussions, to understand what is communicated dissolve in their very birth.. another intention to verbalize this ecstatically alive experience is perceived  and dissolves too. The pain in the instep is again obvious yet there is no agony about that. An itch in the chin, the touching of the hands in the bench, all are felt very clearly. The colorful collage is observed now with no sense of familiar spots from the past. 1, 2, 3, 4 lights are flashing in the bay down on the horizon, on ship-bar is swimming slowly, imposingly, while 3 stars succeed to beat the light of the dazzling moon. An airplane is ready to land and a feeling of satisfaction that tends to appear because of this extraordinary, almost metaphysical experience disappears because there is not enough energy for that.. all energy is invested in observation.. the body is let loose. the necks bends behind, the forearms are dangling ..there is an aerial sense of the whole body till the tip of the fingers.

During this extraordinary moment, the observer, the Time, experience, all disappear. There is not an Ego that evaluates, judges, controls, interferes, there is only choiceless observation. And there is vast beauty, aliveness.

The observer started to go downhill to the main streets of the city. Suddenly he felt his feet very tired so he found another bench in a lonely spot. Cars were moving up and down and he was able to hear the sounds from the cars engines from the moment they were appearing till the moments they were fading. And then there were a few, unexpectedly beautiful moments where there was only the sound of silence, interrupted from slight sounds like the song of a bird. In such a moment turned his head and showed, completely surprised, a bush standing in perfect stillness. Such vast stillness glowed immense beauty. It was like he couldn’t stand all this beauty so he turned his glance on the right. And brought it back the very next moment and it was like the bush was speaking, like its stillnes was implying a huge aliveness that the observer had never felt in the past.

The observer got up and continued his night walk in the city.

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Jorge Kapa

The speaker is never important but you may examine the message, if you wish

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